Pop Art
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Go to the music page!
JC - 2008-06-09 - 19:11:44Reads
A minor and quick aside: Can you read fantasy fiction in public? Is it even allowed in polite society? 'Cause I don't know how to do it. I was on a plane from New York, and, having finished my respectable murder mystery about a guy who puts knocked-out spiders in people's mouths and gags them shut so they feel the spiders wake and go all bitey, I turned to the other book in my bag, Robin Hobb's Ship Of Magic. I was embarrassed. I couldn't help it. Maybe it's the obvious title (it's practically "Wizards And Stuff!"), or the dragons + romance cover - but I had to cover the cover when people came near. Maybe I should have used another dust jacket (a Margaret Atwood or a Kazuo Ishiguro). Then everyone could say, "Hey, he's okay. He likes boring books about people coming to terms with things, or SF written by authors who don't write SF, and don't realize they're engaging in stuff that was hoary when Clifford D. Simak was young." KC - 2008-05-22 - 22:15:23A List, You Say?
Sometimes you eat the Bear, sometimes the Bear eats you. So says Sam Elliot. So says all of us. The bar of the Goat ate the Sheep of the Conrad, but it's the year of the Rat and my Dogs are barking.
LIST!
The Oldest Album (in terms of length of time in my library) That I Listened To This Yearthe Angel Heart soundtrack
The Album I Wanted To Love But Didn't
All Of A Sudden I Miss Everyone (Explosions In The Sky) did nothing to grab me.
This Year's Favorite Albums
The Best Band I Really Should Have Discovered Years Ago
Gogol Bordello
A Book I Finally Got To
A Canticle For Leibowitz (Walter M. Miller, Jr.)
A Great Work Of Fiction I Read
Shadow Of The Torturer (Gene Wolfe)
Movies I Wanted To Love But Didn't
Pan's Labyrinth, like all of Del Toro's stuff, misses the mark. Tone, plot, violence (both real and fantastic) -- they weren't mixed properly. The souffle did not rise. Also, Corpse Bride is a huge disappointment.
The Best Time At A Movie Theater
Plan 9 From Outer Space and The Apple at the So Bad It's Good Film Festival monthly screening. It made me late for work the next day, but it was a great time in a shitty theater. The Apple must be seen by all to be understood.
This Year's Favorite Films
Ratatouille, Once, Hot Fuzz. These are my trifecta, all near-perfect. Of rentals, Funny Games (a really painful film that HATES its audience and their expectations) had the most impact -- and Take Care Of My Cat is very sweet.
This Year's Favorite Songs
New(ish) songs:
- "Don't Let Him Waste Your Time" (Jarvis Cocker)
- "Bathtime In Clerkenwell" (The Real Tuesday Weld)
- "Still Alive" (Jonathon Coulton -- sorry for the geeky, predictable nature of that)
- "Say It To Me Now" (Glen Hansard)
- Track 1 of disk 2 of the Tsuji Ayano compilation (it's in Japanese, dunno what to call it)
- "Strange Chameleon" (The Pillows)
Sad clown!
Old songs:
KC did not listen to old music this year. No good goddam KC.
This Year's Song
"Avalanche" (Thea Gilmore): rumbling, angry, under-boiling passion behind a calm veneer.
The Funniest Thing I Saw
Internet meme junky.
Everyone drifts here, all the time. It's impossible to drive straight.
Best Decision Of The Year
Quit my job/went back to school.
Epiphany Of The Year
Living according to others' expectations will suffocate me, yet here I still drown.
Most Embarrassing Addiction
I really don't owe you this, but...
A List!
This year the Goat did almost nothing. No excuses: life happened. But here's a list -- a taste of things to come. A stocking stuffer!
The Oldest Album (in terms of length of time in my library) That I Listened To This Year
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
Albums I Wanted To Love But Didn't
Neon Bible (The Arcade Fire), Selected Ambient Works 85-92 (Aphex Twin)
This Year's Album
Metallic K.O. (Iggy And The Stooges)
The Best Band I Really Should Have Discovered Years Ago
The Grateful Dead
A Book I Finally Got To
The Short-Timers (Gustav Hasford)
A Great Work Of Fiction I Read
Watchmen (Alan Moore)
Movies I Wanted To Love But Didn't
Inland Empire (David Lynch), Valentino (Ken Russell)
The Best Time At A Movie Theater
Grindhouse
This Year's Favorite Films
Zodiac and No Country For Old Men are mesmeric. I can't rank them yet. Rented films I fell in love with are Roman Polanski's Tess and My Bloody Valentine, a slasher pic from the 80s.
This Year's Song
"Never Comes The Day" (The Moody Blues). Hippie folderol, but it touched on a year of growth (or did it?).
This Year's Favorite Songs
2007 releases:
"Photograph" (Air)
"No Cars Go" (The Arcade Fire)
"Tonight" (Jarvis Cocker)
"Hold Tight" (Death Proof soundtrack)
"Someone Great" (LCD Soundsystem)
"Ever Present Past" (Paul McCartney)
"Mistaken For Strangers" (The National)
"Bros" (Panda Bear)
"Young Folks" (Peter, Bjorn And John -- a carryover from last year)
"Turn On Me" (The Shins)
Old songs:
"You Keep Me Hangin' On" (The Box Tops)
"Sunshine Of Your Love" (Live Cream: Volume 2)
"Why" (Yoko Ono)
"Shame Shame Shame" (Shirley And Company)
"Raw Ramp" (T. Rex)
"Winterlong" (Neil Young)
The Funniest Thing I Saw On TV
A small girl licking a pickle (The Soup, E! Television).
A New Skill I Took Up
Nothing new. But I get better at two things: interviewing, and playing guitar.
Best Decisions Of The Year
Quitting two jobs; interviewing for the one I have now; not buying a condo.
Epiphany Of The Year
I'm a generous person.
My College Rock
A roundup.
Pavement
Pavement is a prefab cult band. Because the music is verbose and deliberately throwaway, it's model college rock. As slacker-dandies given to lo-fi snobbery, they're clever. I used to hate them. Today the rubble is warm and inviting. And that makes it fun. (Hear: "Kennel District," Wowee Zowee (1995).)
Pixies
With plenty of cheek, cactus and Dali, theirs is a ghost-town approach. (Hear: "Havalina," Bossanova (1990).)
Radiohead
Ten years on, the sound of OK Computer (1997) is full and bright. People hoped this would be their next record (not just Radiohead's). Believers sang like Thom Yorke. They couldn't wait for Jonny Greenwood to play the guitar again.
But the band dulled. More and more, contrivance is boss -- and pure sonic fascination has its rewards, but not at the expense of melody or good old-fashioned hooks. Today our glum chums are mad at Tony Blair, and they're still bent on being abstruse. However, In Rainbows (2007) is something else.
I continue to listen. (Hear: "Fake Plastic Trees," The Bends (1995).)
Stereolab
Patisserie for commies: They make furniture music that smells like vinyl. (Hear: "Les Yper Yper Sound," Cybele's Reverie EP (1995).)
JC - 2007-11-13 - 11:31:18The Movie Brats
Woody Allen
He's as famous as the Brooklyn Bridge: a neurotic nebbish, tied to a clever muse (Diane Keaton in Annie Hall, Scarlett Johansson in Scoop). After some overreaching (the "spare" tragedies of September and Interiors), and some lovely reminiscing (Radio Days), it's clear that Woody wants to be someone else.
Ingmar Bergman.
He strains for tastefulness. Like Mel Brooks, a comic-turned-director and fellow Jew who riffs on movies and genres, Woody was irreverent at first, his appropriations fond and funny. Nowadays he takes himself seriously. Morality and the modern intellectual idiot are his subjects. Sporting the Merchant-Ivory virus, Allen is pseudo-classicist. He's too old for his time.
Zelig told much: The folly of freaks who want to fit in, fitting in because they don't -- Woody's take on Hollywood (and Self). And Tinseltown loves him. His movies make just enough money. His dialogue makes actors pant.
Still, there's no daring. It flew the coop a long time ago.
JC - 2007-10-15 - 19:58:23Zep
were pretty goddamn good, weren't they?
JC - 2007-09-23 - 21:59:30The Movie Brats
Martin Scorsese
Welcome to the 1B class. (The Movie Brats: 1A is just down the hall.) Here's your first lesson.
His antiheroes are battered saints, his best films asthmatic and personal. The violent young mooks of Mean Streets (1973), Taxi Driver (1976) and Goodfellas (1990) are nervy New Yorkers full of guilt. Before Tarantino, Marty was the acolyte of pop trash who wanted to make Films. The clash between art and pulp shades his work.
Scorsese is a stylist. New York, New York (1977) was dire showmanship. Raging Bull (1980) was the art film side of Body And Soul (1947, dir. Robert Rossen). It jabbed brilliantly (e.g., taut edits and a blunt portrayal of manimal magnetism), but it needed sweetening. In Taxi Driver (1976), Robert De Niro’s nutjob is a bit tender. In Bull, the actor is a grotesque. He never crosses the identification gap for the viewer. It’s a poor expose of macho pigs, but a fine showcase for De Niro.
Like Casino (1995) and Bringing Out The Dead (1999), The Departed (2006) was pure mechanics. The Bob Dylan documentary, No Direction Home (2005), was flat and astounding. Marty and Bob peaked a long time ago, and they almost killed themselves getting there. Out of the wilderness they became craftsmen. No longer anxious, or riddled with coke, the 64-year-old Scorsese may want to dial down. I hope he doesn’t.
JC - 2007-09-14 - 18:14:27Ingmar Bergman
1918-2007
JC - 2007-08-05 -
11:33:54
Michelangelo Antonioni
1912-2007
JC - 2007-08-05 -
11:32:21
Pssst...
In lieu of an actual issue, I review the Todd Rundgren album, A Wizard, A True Star. Hope you like! JC - 2007-04-30 - 09:26:41James Brown 1933-2006
JC - 2007-01-11 -
00:25:10
Winston (2006)
(This first appeared on the Goat in 2003. The "Love" album inspired me to spruce it up.)Last night I dreamt about John Lennon. I was in a crowded theater, waiting for The Beatles to reunite onstage after more than thirty years. John was alive, and the group was finally going to play. I knew I was dreaming. But there they were, necktied and respectably older. They did all the old stuff: solo tunes, group tunes -- the whole shebang. The set was lively, loose, and fun. John, in particular, looked great -- optimal John, you could say. And I found it quite characteristic of him to slow the show down in the middle and engage the audience in a banter, which the band funneled into pop bits created on the spot. I loved it. Looking about, I saw kids clapping, young and old, smiling and enjoying themselves. I was a kid, too, and how appropriate: John always wrote for the inner child. A crazy dream? Yeah, but I loved every second of it...
I don't know if John Lennon was a genius; I don't know if he was a nice guy. But I do know that he was a great singer, and his music means a lot to a lotta people, myself included.
I can't write about The Beatles. To do so would be silly and redundant -- we all know how great they were. Sgt. Pepper is a marvelous album -- why? It encapsulates everything great about art and music and bullshit. In breaking free the conventions of music, it killed rock & roll. That's a big claim for anyone to make, but there you go.
Rock & roll is never just what it is (things rarely are). At its best, it is among the finest, most expressive and direct means of communication. And now that it's been historicized to death, we can safely say that rock & roll is first and foremost about pain (with pleasure not too far behind).
This is not to say that rock & roll (never just "rock") cannot work simply as entertainment. Much of its longevity is down to the wily shenanigans of businessmen and art school types (and kids on the street/in the 'burbs, bored out of their minds). But if we are to take rock & roll seriously, and for more than at face value, we mustn't lose sight of its base in the blues.
Certainly, we are talking about more than just race. We are talking about hurt. John was a talent who, like Hitler before him, came out of a bad family situation. Am I being too simplistic? Perhaps. But it's hard to deny or put aside all the creativity that came from that pain, and it's hard not to trace such an outgrowth to the way it developed.1
Whether possessed or observed, genius is an elusive property. After all, what do we really know about this bandied word? We know that it is not a vacuum. That it takes genius to recognize genius, let alone show it. Life, then, is about other people. To get things done, we cannot simply (re-)produce by our own selves -- we have to help each other out with our respective loads.
"The daisy chain makes it plain that we're all just yin and yang." There would be no Pet Sounds without Phil Spector, no Citizen Kane without the Germans. Had Lou Reed been unashamed about who he was and what his parents wanted him to be, the mad repetitions of "Sister Ray" would never exist. The cost of living is the price of poetry (and all subsequent liberation). In a sense, we're all capable of genius. We just have to eat slop and ask for more, especially when preaching about love and law. We have to sacrifice, and we have to do it together. That's not cynical, and that's not philosophical. That's life.
So John was this and John was that. To pick one over the other is meaningless and fair. Like John, I prefer the "truth," and the idea that truth is bunk and never entirely honest. As long as we're upfront about it, and true to ourselves, being a dreamer is OK. Because it's rock & roll, and rock & roll is real, the core message of Lennon's music2 (if there is one) is that we owe it to ourselves to live life fully, to fill in as much of the canvas as possible, and to just sort of play it.
There comes a point when a magazine like Rolling Stone (or NME, or Spin) will not do. When the mass effort to categorize and rate damns our subjectivity. Exploded Goat doesn't want to canonize or rate people's achievements. There is no prescribed standard of excellence.3 KC and I are simply trying to figure out what we like, and hopefully who we are, too. That's all. It could be important, or not. It shouldn't matter. If you like us, great. If you don't, fine. We like the audience we have.
In the end, John was only John, I am only Joe, and you are only you. We are the eggmen, and we can only be ourselves.
1Sometimes I wonder if one's celebrity (or dramatic world-changing) is not the result of that person's bruised ego. John's anger was apparently big enough that the whole world heard it, and still does. All that pain comes busting out, so much so that the amplified artist is with us, now that the lengths of his isolation have spread to win the hearts of many. That, I think, is a wonderful way of finding out just how loved each one of us really is.
Though it may be hard to see, all of us have someone who loves us, right?
Anyway, all we can do is be.
2Or, for that matter, Kiss -- the band.
3Most "critics" fuss when it comes to taste. I guess that's OK -- but this is not the Goat. I'll bet most of them know nothing about pain, and, consequently, very little about rock & roll. Besides, the best music (or cinema) is always the best criticism of that form.
Another Triumphant Return
It's Halloween. Do you know where your black cats are?
KC - 2006-10-31 - 20:53:59Arthur Lee
1945-2006
JC - 2006-08-07 -
16:13:40
July 2006. Read.
Are you reading?
KC - 2006-07-26 - 19:57:05Syd Barrett
1946-2006
JC - 2006-07-11 -
11:47:39
April. One Year. Hurray.
One year since our change of format, and we celebrate by posting very little! Hope you like.
KC - 2006-04-29 - 08:43:50Back Like Batman
Here you go, friends -- more obscuranta for your reading pleasure. And remember (because this is important): Hippies can't stand death metal.
KC - 2006-01-20 - 22:19:36Be Vewwy Vewwy Quiet
We're writing novels. KC - 2005-11-30 - 21:23:08Kent, Inc.
Here at the Goat, we like to write about the stuff we want to read about. And I love to read KC. The more he inserts himself, the more fun it is.These reviews are the real Kent. The lack of pretension, the deepness of thought, the bending of format: They don't just click. They define him.
movies
music
games
anime
JC - 2005-11-03 - 09:55:28Lemme Get A Bit Misty-Eyed
This month, the Exploded Goat URL is four years old. Prior to going live with our own goodness in 2001, we lived on a webspace at USC for two years. In all that time, we did about six weeks of content.But it's damn fine stuff. So Joe and I decided to make short lists of each other's work. Maybe you missed it, or maybe you should read it again.
I won't review the reviews or tell you why I like them. Read them for yourself.
movies
Joe likes Peckinpah. Here, he explains.
Movie Snips 1 and Movie Snips 2
Joe and I have appreciably different styles, but we do like brevity.
music
We like to write about the things we love in different ways -- not just book reports and grades. Here, Joe succeeds (even though he still grades).
KC - 2005-10-31 - 17:33:51October Dreams
Now, more than ever.
KC - 2005-10-31 - 17:30:42September Is A State Of... Wait A Minute!
Just to fool ya, here we are in the MORNING with new content -- for last month.
Such a good website. Think I'll have some.
KC - 2005-09-30 - 08:36:17September Is A State Of Mind
August, dead soon, gives birth to its last issue:
Someday, I'm gonna take a class in design and these things will look good.
Beat us with your perusal.
KC - 2005-08-31 - 21:10:38The New, Arty ExG
July, and that means more Goat.
Spare and dark, because I'm watching Bergman, and reading books. Books are nothing but text on white paper. Unless they have pictures. Right now, the book I'm reading does.
Good night!
KC - 2005-07-31 - 21:14:01Three Hours Under The Rope
As the June issue escapes into the twilight of June...
T. Rex. Japanese horror. 4AD.
For you, they show our love. Kiss?
KC - 2005-06-30 - 21:04:43Because We're Not Just Google Ads
We have new content!
With three reviews to keep you coming back for more. And keep reading the Goat, because one of these days Joe will go psycho on you, and then where will you be?
I don't know either.
KC - 2005-05-29 - 19:43:38I Can't Believe I Forgot To Do This
The new issue abides!
This month I'm all about the FLCL, Joe expounds on The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (the new one, with a kick-ass review), and he sings "We Are The Champions."
In other news: The site has Google ads! Took all of fifteen minutes to code (being the corporate shill I am), but already I want to praise the crap I hate.
Next month's issue (for this month) will be done soon. I'm writing about cartoons you've seen, Korean movies you haven't -- stuff like that.
KC - 2005-05-12 - 19:50:51The Goat Was In Trouble
But now we're back! We had server problems, but we fought 'em, and now we can give our message of peace and love.Except 16 Horsepower broke up. So I have no love left to give.
KC - 2005-04-18 - 19:04:00Introducing For The Very Last Time
The new and deproved...
Exploded Goat!
Raaa!!!
To the first issue of the Exploded Goat, the March issue, we dedicate the lion's share of our coverage to Takeshi Kitano, and to a couple of great reviews by the one and only Joe Cormack. Is this a renaissance? Will all other magazines fade from need?
Probably not. But I'm sure you will get a kick out of our nascent design skills, tied to our not-so-nascent reviewing skills.
Remember, KC loves you.
KC - 2005-03-29 - 19:09:54Wait
The Goat is back. We always come back.But things are gonna be different.
The challenge is to be a site that means something. One that has good writing and a keen sense of taste -- unfiltered and real. As a two-man show, the Goat is a big deal. To turn a hobby into a career is hard. KC & I work full-time. Rare is the chance to sit down and do something great. We want to be us, and we want to be unique. But we're slow writers, and we don't embrace the concept of "blog" as fully as we should. We don't wanna be current. We want to infuse each piece with the substance of ideas and compelling arguments. That takes time. So we act now, more than ever, to make the Goat a hybridized sort of thing -- and to not promise anything more than that.
The Goat is a pamphlet disguised as a website. Most online rags thrive on the constant update, creating an expectation of immediacy that is immediately taken for granted. By contrast, the Goat looks lazy. We add two to three articles a month. Five years later, we have a small but devoted readership, and for that we are grateful. But a website is not a magazine, and vice versa. The word "web-zine" is, perhaps, too ambitious. We can't be the best of both worlds. We can only approximate them.
We don't wanna change the backbone of the site. If we hired other people, the Goat might flourish, but the site is a diary -- a dialogue between friends. A spark of nostalgia and dissent from the way things are. In other words, we are brainy, but we don't like to be pretentious. And we don't wanna grow up (well, we do, but it's hard). We don't wanna compete.
The Goat will update in the form of a monthly "issue." That way, an exact deadline is set -- one we could meet. Plus, the new content will be centered on the front page, and the archives easier to use. As such, the Goat won't feed the false hope of being anything other than what it is: an anti-blog taking up real blog space.
Look for it -- next month.
JC - 2005-01-28 - 14:08:36A Scene From Real Life
It's been a while, hasn't it? Hope you're doing well.With me, stuff's ok. Did a review for A Scene At The Sea that I meant to put up a month ago, and one for Tomie that I should have mentioned, but didn't. I've been busy, my friends. Busy with work, studies, and avoiding the harsh light of day. You know how it can be on moles like me. More to come, as always. Maybe some Kiyoshi Kurosawa reviews, because ya'll been clamoring for them.
KC - 2004-11-27 - 20:01:21If I Made Up My Own Language, Would You Sing Me A Song In It?
'Cause I'd sue for copyright infringement if you did. And that would not serve your efforts well. So I don't recommend singing to me in my made-up language.What about reading my ep-guides? I like to write semi-lengthy reviews of anime series that are long past their prime and well out of the public eye. It is a matter of a) maintaining the street cred, and b) diverting attention from the Goat. Too much attention is uncouth, ungentlemanly, so we focus on reviews and insights that are much too late to actually inform or interest.
We are a two-man army against the web's instantaneous sort of relevance. We stand athwart history, arms outstretched, saying, "Wasn't this Japanese cartoon from about five years ago pretty great?" And we aren't even kitschy about it.
Speaking of which, wasn't this episode of Outlaw Star pretty great?
KC - 2004-09-27 - 17:14:16Kinda Like A Zombie. Y'know, Except If You Shoot Me In The Head, I Don't Die.
Hey captains and kids, you might think you're owed some sort of explanation for my leave of absence. Well, you ain't gettin' one, 'cause I just posted a review for a Japanese horror movie AND a review for Azumanga Daioh. So there. KC - 2004-09-26 - 17:34:54Best Actor
The Bride (Uma Thurman) kills Bill (David Carradine) in vol. 2. Carradine gives the performance of his life in the role of his life. The Kill Bill movies gain from that voice, that presence, in a way that is similar to Brando's success with The Godfather: David does Bill with so much ease that it looks natural. And the legacy of that face -- the mug of his dad, John Carradine -- is plain to see.
Bony and gaunt, it carries the tragedy of the theatre, of prodigal sons and fathers. You get a real sense of history. Like the Barrymores, the Carradines are a line of Shakespearean actors who foundered in cheapies.
David has come full circle. In Kill Bill, the mystic child of the Sixties is an old man, a wise fool. The mergence of art and trash is complete. So, come Oscar time, I hope he wins.
JC - 2004-08-11 - 12:41:05Everything Dies
But the Goat lives ON!Sorry, I'm a little excited. I'm just happy that our first anime review in months is up. There's plenty of whining, so watch out. It's for Kino's Journey, which I enjoyed immensely, though I didn't finish watching it.
By the way, I saw Love & Pop, Hideaki Anno's live-action debut. It was almost terrific. It suffers from the same problems as the rest of Anno's work - too much heart on the sleeve, too much announcing his theme with big neon lights. Visually it was exciting (all of it shot on DV), and sometimes it was harrowing. I recommend a look.
KC - 2004-08-09 - 19:15:43And The "Beat" Goes On
(Thought I'd get that joke out of the way.) And if you're new, you should know that the Exploded Goat will never be updated on a daily basis. Unless you give us lots of money. Until that time, updates will come whenever possible. Just to let you know.But the Takeshi Kitano stuff is exploding at a furious pace. Here's Boiling Point, which has the worst American title of any of his films. Enjoy, lien freu.
KC - 2004-08-05 - 21:03:28Hey You GUYS!!!
1...2...3...meow.That's as clever as I feel today. And everyday, my God, it is good to see you. It has been so LONG! You look great. Have you lost weight?
But seriously: I've been on a major hiatus of self-discovery, and I have found that I can't live without you, my adoring readers. My fearless readers. And so to you I give a list of what I've been doing.
- Watching Takeshi Kitano movies
- Learning to love anime again
- Switching hosts
- Studying my CSS, PHP, and HTML
The fruits of which are borne on this very site. I mean, as we speak, my review of Violent Cop is up for your delectation. More to come, sooner than you think.
Funny thing, almost as soon as the Goat was in full swing (this was three years ago, before we had our own domain), I fell out of favor with those damned Japanese cartoons. (All the friggin' same, doncha know.) I wouldn't watch 'em if you paid someone else to pay me to do it. There's Wodehouse and Dostoevsky that have gone unread, dammit.
But I'm changing my tune. More and more, I am becoming reacquainted with what brought me to the stuff in the first place; I have readjusted myself to Sturgeon's Law. Expect more anime, and with a greater degree of felicity in the conversation. I feel smart about this stuff again, and that always gets me to the typewriter.
Goating will be faster and sexier.
Which means that, as I put all my studies to good use, the site will be a mess.
I'm a bit ashamed that NOTHING was posted for the Goat in June, but that will change. The Goat is back.
KC - 2004-08-02 - 18:28:19The Movie Brats: Part 3
Francis Ford Coppola
Pre-Apocalypse Now (1979), Coppola was a god. He's been off since. The Cotton Club (1984), Tucker (1988), Rumble Fish (1983) – these are good films. (The first five minutes of Dracula (1992) are the best in a long time.) But none of them are sustained.
Coppola is a writer. He directs to protect his own scripts. Like Hal Ashby, he can band talent; he has a discriminating eye. This makes him a director, not a king. He guides. He lets his films breathe.
But he was a king. He lived his movies, and he second-guessed himself. Plus, he had a weakness for gimcracks.
Coppola had a dream. He'd be the titan at Zoetrope, his film house. Out of the desert (Old Hollywood), he would lead the kids of New Hollywood. They would be independent. But the blandness of the studios got a spinal tap and a facelift: Because of their success, the anti-establishment became the establishment de novo. And Coppola was the spearhead.
Zoetrope was supposed to break the mold, but it broke the bank. Coppola tried to be the beneficent don, everything to everyone. Needless to say, he failed.
. . .
Apocalypse is the movie brats' film. The highs are in the finished product. The lows are documented in Hearts Of Darkness (1991), a film about the making-of.
A.N. took a dump on the auteur theory that it pumped. The fallout was bad, but Coppola got enshrined for having lost it in the jungle. He used real corpses; he goaded a drunk Martin Sheen into cutting himself. (Said my dad: "Joe, this is NOT how you make a movie.") Francis took his ego to the shedding limit. He willed the film. But it cost the rest of his career. I don't think he can get it up.
Now, deep in the heart of Napa Valley, you can find him stomping on grapes and passing out feta cheese to the locals.
Kiss the ring – goodbye.
JC - 2004-07-01 - 23:36:47The Movie Brats: Part 2
Robert Towne
We often think the director is a buck-stopping Genius. (But you're only as good as the people you work with.) Bob Towne was the first screenwriter to get this kind of star treatment. Shampoo (1975); Chinatown (1974); The Last Detail (1973); even doctored scripts like The Godfather (1972): The guy can write. He fathers dialogue that sticks and burns. It looks easy. Chinatown is a hit -- why? Everything is done by necessity.
Today, he is on Tom Cruise's payroll. He's back to pushing pencils on the spy farm (cf. his work on Mission: Impossible (1996) and 1964's The Man From U.N.C.L.E.), a regression from the leap he made in the Seventies. The reason?
Greystoke: The Legend Of Tarzan, Lord Of The Apes (1984).
For years, Bob rapped about this f*****g Tarzan movie. It was his baby. During production, he blew his mind on coke1. The great Personal Best (1982), Towne's directorial debut, flopped, and his marriage waned. He was a paranoid mess.
Greystoke had no ending. It was an unfilmable script. Hugh Hudson (Chariots Of Fire) signed on to direct -- Towne was crushed. In the end, he took his name off the picture and used a pseudonym: P.H. Vazak, the name of his dead dog.
Towne has nothing to prove now. The man who wrote Chinatown is flab.
1Slander? No. Good copy? Yes!
JC - 2004-05-23 - 23:50:29The Movie Brats
TR!O is showing the new Easy Riders Raging Bulls doc., and I have a new feature.Starting today, I will post a list. A bi-weekly list that talks about the directors of the Sixties generation, the last great tide of filmmakers in Hollywood. Directors who have nothing but a mere trickle of muse in 2004.
What happened? Is there a common thread that ties the demise of their lot? Maybe. But here's a cautionary tale for the would-be filmist. It pays to be young, in more ways than one.
Don't be a pig.
George Lucas
The Goat killed the Lucas hype (see KC's feature), but he saw it coming. He's a marketing wizard who's seen better days. After all, HE said that he didn't like to direct, and Star Wars (1977) was a fluke. He knew it. That's why The Empire Strikes Back (1980) is a gem: betters took over, briefly. They sublet a winning property. Now Lucas is back to writing and directing, and he's STILL the producer on the sidelines. That's the problem. Episodes I (1999) and II (2002) need a guide dog, not a yes-man. We're stuck in the rut of THX-1138 (1971): a neon car chase, a dull script, and a lot of drab white.
Steven Spielberg
Spielberg puts feeling into spectacle with an almost religious zest. Like Cecil B. DeMille, he knows how to make an entertainment. But for DeMille, entertainment won out. He loved to be crass. He was honest about it. He never sported a higher agenda.
Spielberg f****d up.
Now, I love Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom (1984). It makes fun of movie fun. It's the best, most adrenalized film Spielberg did, and it doesn't stop for a moment. (Leaner and meaner, Duel (1971) is close.) But after Temple went sour for a lot of people, he tried to "say" something. It was inevitable. He grew up. In doing so, he equated art with seriousness, and only Schindler's List (1993) can be said to work that way. (The gravity of the subject is too personal.)
The moral of the story? When corn is cold, it doesn't pop.
Michael Cimino
The Deer Hunter (1978) is a great film -- Cimino got an Oscar. But it went to his head. He lost it in the details: Heaven's Gate (1980) had a runaway budget, but the film has no center. You see it to rubberneck. In The Year Of The Dragon (1985), all you get are shootouts -- ten minutes of power in a morass of crap. Everything is done for the epic tone. Nothing makes sense. The storytelling is gone.
What a waste, that so much talent could happen to such bad judgement.
JC - 2004-05-10 - 17:52:10Like Your Movie Review 3 Weeks Irrelevant?
Because I do. In order to update the Goat once a day (my days happen to last 312 of your Earth hours), I bring you the best Dawn Of The Dead review there is. At least, by me.There should be more stuff on the way, like a new episode guide. But who knows if that will happen? If not, we can always blame...Bela Fleck.
KC - 2004-04-13 - 19:34:36It's Like A Forgotten Punchline
Doing anything on April 1st would have been the doom of the Goat, so new content had to wait for the 2nd. And here it is, in the form of a Darkness Falls review. I know you were just sitting at home, thinking, "I would like to read some overweaning, underdeveloped commentary on an entirely forgettable movie."Well, that's why we exist, kemosabes.
KC - 2004-04-02 - 21:25:54Sons And Mothers
The Passion Of The Christ is beyond review. It is an experience. Fuck the hype. The film does everything it wants to do: show the passion of the Christ. It shows that freedom is the cost of truth. It goes past religion or politics, or violence (all these are present). You see the film, and you take something from it. I think it's the best horror film of the year. JC - 2004-03-13 - 11:43:36Miss Me?
I missed you.Yeah, more than a bit.
Fact is, the Goat has been slow to kick itself up in the morning, and that's my fault. Nevermind - at least for this week, I'm actually interested in what the Goat has to say, and until I get bored and whine that nobody loves me, the Goat will be updated.
First, some frank and open discussion about video games. I like 'em short. Really. I know I should say that Max Payne 2 and Call Of Duty only take a few hours to complete, what a waste of money they are, etc.
But I can't. My re-entry into "the real world" (which seems to be a kind of cruel simulacrum) showed that time is a precious commodity, more precious than video games. Whereas in my youth, a game that would take thirty+ hours to complete was a blessing, since I was dependent on the kindness of strangers for my CG entertainment, and I had a lot of free time.
This is no longer true. Quality is more important1 than quantity or even replayability. So ahoy with the short games, world of games. More Call Of Dutys, more Prince Of Persias. More!
And what about more reviews for the Goat? Like one for Outlaw Star. Someday, I might even tell you why a smart-seeming guy like me spends all his time writing about Japanese cartoons. Maybe.
1Yeah, I know, you don't want long, bad games but games of epic length and mind-boggling quality, but let's be realistic. The amount of talent it takes to create something good is immense, particularly something that by its very nature has to be developed corporately. Assuming the game mechanic is sound - that the quality of the game isn't marred by the gameplay, just the content - it still requires more skill to maintain a high level of quality the longer the game is. Content has to be created. It does not come pre-fab, and it is qualitatively subjective - you can't be 100% sure that the content is great in and of itself. That being said, it is inherently more difficult to create a long great game than a short great game. And a game that goes from excellence to mediocrity in thirty hours rather than staying good for fifteen is not a better playing experience.
KC - 2004-02-18 - 19:18:06Joe Is A Fine Writer
Let's work through a couple of suppositions. The first is that the essay format is good for conveying ideas, information, etc. It is not the only form. While it has many boons (e.g. the semi-hallucinatory effect of convincing people to believe things that they don't once you've enveloped them in the rhythm and style), it is not perfect. I don't think it serves rock 'n' roll well.Read Joe's feature on The Velvet Underground. Then read it again.
KC - 2004-01-23 - 07:14:23And Here You Are, Hoping The Goat Was Dead
But we're not. We...that is, I don't care for the New Year, so I didn't join the celebration. As far as I'm concerned, it has only tax significance.But I'm glad to post a new review, and to say that good things are happening. You see, if I announce something new, it will never happen. Which means that I can quit worrying about it. So I'm saying now that the anime section will be filled to the brim with wonderful things.
That's the future - tonight belongs to Raw Meat.
KC - 2004-01-10 - 20:52:10Fallout
A Note
I'm not a critic. I'm The Enthusiast. Critics like to categorize. They mistake quality for influence, and there's too much description; they overuse adjectives instead of points, and they think that history is equal to a review. Most of the writing is academic.
The fact that KC & I work is an important one. We don't want to be the scene -- a blog that's put out by shiftless hipsters who have nothing better to do. I like the reviewer-as-hobbyist -- a free aesthete -- not someone who does it for a living...
Let It Loose
The other night I saw Mariah Carey live. It was a good break. These days, when it's not tennis or the treadmill, or going to the city (San Francisco), I've been calling home: My mom has a lump in her uterus the size of a baseball. Signs point to the positive, but still -- I'm worried.
I also bring my work home with me.
At the end of the day, I'm tired and moody. (During the holiday season, customers are too.) My hours change all the time, and I'm always on my feet...
The Great Brain
"Joey has to learn to take care of himself."
I'm sensitive. I project a lot, and I need to accept. People use time to break the silence. I need a mantra. Some daily prayer to get me good and going.
I know: I take things the wrong way, and I gotta be perfect. I can also be incredibly naïve. Me and my blob. My blob of negative energy.
Can you forgive? (Young people are so full of themselves...)
Silly
I want to be on an English farm, where the ghost of Tolkien smokes the pipes of peace, and the moss makes a din when the cold dawn breaks.
JC - 2003-12-18 - 09:39:25A New Review? Say It Ain't So
I'm tired, and I have nothing clever to say. So here's the Bubba Ho-tep review. Read it, and enjoy. KC - 2003-12-17 - 17:51:55One Thing I Like About The Goat
Not only is there no theme to the movies reviewed, no attention is paid to timeliness. We are only too happy to cover movies that nobody cares about, or months after they matter to most of the good people, as Slim Cessna calls y'all.Take, for instance, my brand new review for 28 Days Later. The film (which is pretty good, but none-too memorable) dropped off the radar screen a couple weeks ago, and now I deign review it. Maybe it's perversity. I don't know.
Good to talk to you, by the way. It's been almost a month since I posted anything. Makes me feel like going on a sort of marathon reviewing session; where there's so much content that anyone would feel kinda churlish for complaining.
But that's not going to happen. So, until it does, listen to Explosions In The Sky. Their sound is like a drill sergeant who grabs you by the lapels (assuming they are present on your shirt) and shouts, "Hope, damn it!"
While you're at it, read Shakespeare. I recommend Richard II.
KC - 2003-11-20 - 20:14:52A New Career In A New Town
It's starting to rain now, and the Christmas lights are up. It's dark, but I feel fine. I graduated from college, I got a job, and I said goodbye to the life that I didn't want to leave behind. I work in a semi-developed area: all the buyers are rich, white, and snotty. (Most of them, anyway – there's a prison down the road.) I can barely break even.How are you?
The Goat is doing a feature, but I have a new guide for living: Kill Bill.
Love you long time,
Joey
Slowly I Write, Word By Word
Things have been slow on the Goat, and that's to be expected. After all, neither Joe nor the illustrious Me gets paid for this, and we have full-time jobs. We're also slow writers: I'm working on this external writing project that has taken the majority of my intellect and concentration.But, half-ass measure by half-ass measure, the site is starting to look like something it should. You can bring us home to meet your parents. More stuff should be uploaded soon, though my attention span IS doled out in Cornelius albums, and Fantasma is half over...
KC - 2003-10-25 - 14:54:57KC's Crossing
The review for Miller's Crossing is up. It may sound like I didn't enjoy it, but I did. It just doesn't hold up to scrutiny.Being a horror movie buff makes you odd. For instance, when I saw the ads for Jan DeBont's Haunting, I threw things at the TV. Now I see ads for the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and it makes me want to cry. Many horror films could stand to be updated or rethought (e.g. Last House On The Left, which has dated terribly). But why mess with something that is perfect? Tobe Hooper's Texas Chainsaw Massacre is a brilliantly disturbing piece of horror verite, a complete original. The remake seems to have a lot of pretty people screaming and running around. Maybe there's some nudity - that, at least, would distract me from my boiling rage.
KC - 2003-10-06 - 21:05:48The Reason I Haven't Updated In A While
Because you guys didn't like the Dream City Film Club, and you caused them to break up. That was four years ago, but it's just starting to bug me. So until you rectify the error, no more Goat. KC - 2003-10-05 - 15:34:08Two Annoying Statements
Actually, one: What the hell were you thinking when you listened to Pavement in the '90s? They're like the Pixies with too much irony, and they play the same goddamn song over and over. I'm sure you love Slanted & Enchanted, but here's what I think: if I want to listen to NOISE, why don't I just put on The Birthday Party, since that would mean listening to Nick Cave, an improvement on just about anything?I don't get the appeal. Sorry, I don't.
As new things are attempted, the look of the Goat will be in flux. Uh...yeah. And I've a new film review: Institute Benjamenta. The movie was a severe disappointment. Read why.
Flame on!
KC - 2003-09-22 - 18:10:05A Few Cosmetic Changes
To make things blander, I retooled the Goat to be less interesting - now, there is less of everything on the site, in terms of design. Soon, we'll just be a large graphic that says "Go away"...But until that happens, welcome to Exploded Goat mark 3.1. The redesign is small, but the internal structure has been changed, so that makes stuff easier. For instance, the tables on the site are gone. So...for those of you with ancient browsers, the site may not work. My suggestion: upgrade.
Some kinks are still being worked out, but this is what the site will look like. (Because of the new backbone, color changes (et al) will be a breeze, so that might change. Who knows.)
The important thing to know is that we're back and ready to lay waste to all those who fall in our path. New content starting tomorrow. Wait with baited breath.
KC - 2003-09-21 - 16:13:38Why Nothing Is Up Today
If you don't want to read the churlish whining of an angry young man, go somewhere else. I'm pissed off, and there's nothing I can do about it. I want to stew in my childish rage; I want to tilt at windmills and lift my fists to the sun and say "Shove off, you stupid sun-bitch!"A review of The Vanishing, filled with lots of insight and good humor (and references to a horror movie that is underrated, The Hitcher) was supposed to be on the site today, but my computer ate it. Since the only serious work I do depends on the reliability of my computer, I'm both pissed and perplexed. So, nothing new this week, 'cause I'll be damned if I can write on that frickin' (not the linguistic restraint) movie in the next few days.
Damn it all to hell.
Enjoy the rest of the site. Read Joe's new song review.
KC - 2003-09-01 - 21:05:27A Dry Spell Again
But I have a good excuse: I got Soul Calibur 2. The first Soul Calibur was perfect. This one is perfect too. If you want something else in a fighter game, you might be a decent person, and you might have a good heart, but I would not seek your company. KC - 2003-08-29 - 18:51:39Clarification
For us (Joe and myself), a review isn't a sort of popped-off reaction - we're careful to craft something useful. This means a) we take longer to do it, and b) ideas have to be eschewed if the shape of the review doesn't allow for them.Take the Tiger Lillies review. I gave the impression of the album without discussing individual songs since that would have disrupted the flow and weakened the writing. But I want to say more:
Brothel To The Cemetery is annoying because it combines one of my favorite artistic forms with one of my least favorite artistic tendencies. On this album they play a Brecht/Weill sort of Germanic pub music, stuff I love. But they seek to offend for no other reason than to offend. For example, the song "Banging In The Nails" is about crucifying Jesus. With glee. The Goat is the last place in the world for religious talk, but this sort of thing doesn't sit well with me. I love the music, and several songs make it clear that they are talented and good at what they do...but I am given pause. Just thought you oughta know.
In the history of the Exploded Goat, August has been our best ever, averaging roughly 1000 hits a day (according to server statistics and a front page counter that's not too inaccurate). Enjoy yourself, and feel free to contact either one of us, kent@explodedgoat.com or joe@explodedgoat.com. We like feedback and friendliness...or we would, if we ever got any. Tell your friends about us - but not too many. We're nowhere near the bandwidth limit, but I'm still scared of it.
KC - 2003-08-22 - 22:31:31
Is Enough Enough?
Have you seen eX-Driver? Good show.The Goat is kicking back into gear, so all you doubters and "haters" can eat our dust. Sure, nobody doubts or hates us, but I can read your minds.
Sorry. That doesn't make sense. I've been listening to the Tiger Lillies. Heard of them? Here's a lyric:
On thursday I throw molotov
At the orphan's home
I love those little orphans
Charred down to the bone
I'm terrible I'm terrible
I shouldn't be allowed
To sing my songs of filth
To a decent crowd
The singer uses a falsetto and plays an accordion. Expect a full review on Friday.
KC - 2003-08-20 - 20:05:45Why We I Suck
Unexpected things came up. The sort of things that happen when you don't think they will. That aren't in the realm of possibilities one can expect.Anyway, I got a job. Last time that happened the Exploded Goat went on a small KC-hiatus, which wasn't good. It won't happen again. Now we'll be working on a site paid for with money earned, not borrowed or stolen1.
And of course, Joe, the battle-scarred Joe - scars that say he has many long stories to tell, but who keeps mainly to himself, and even the little kids know that you don't go up to him, you wait for him to come to you. That Joe has put up another round of small movie reviews, Movie Snips 2. He talks about a few movies I agonized over having to write about, and now feel I don't have to. Woman In The Dunes, for example. Or Kwaidan.
Next week the pace should be back to normal. So stay tuned, all of our new friends, and don't abandon the Goat you've just learned to love.
1Of course, I'm only talking about myself. Joe the unimpeachable is much more scrupulous. And I'm not engaging in some sort of self-effacing irony here. Joe's a good guy. Read his stuff. Here, here, and here.
KC - 2003-08-15 - 09:00:28Unpleasant Realization
I just realized that a few of my opening messages have inadvertently ripped off the cards for Adult Swim. I saw one that was like a post I did...and I'm pretty sure that theirs came first, and I stole it.Unintentionally.
So apologies to anyone who saw the similarity and figured I was nothing more than a thief. I'm not (at least not on purpose).
KC - 2003-08-07 - 23:46:38A Deep Concern For The Welfare Of Others
Articles like this, and their subsequent reaction in the game community, give me pause. Essentially, the article says that the GameCube is a bad sell. If I owned stock in Nintendo, that would be upsetting. But I don't.Some folk say:
I sensed that the 'Cube boat was sinking recently, and sold my stuff/games to get money for an XBox. Seems like a good move so far.
blink...
blink...
Is GameCube going to fail me, now that it isn't selling? Is Ikaruga going to quit because other people did not buy the system? Believe it or not, I hook up my Dreamcast from time to time. And goddamn, but it works. Really, after Sega abandoned it and everything.
Moral of the story? Good games are fun to play regardless of where you play them. Abandoning a system, or being proud of abandoning a system because the company that produced it isn't making money off of it, is plain silly.
So is Samurai Deeper Kyo, which I have a review of. Yesterday I put up the brand new episode guide for Outlaw Star. And there's another review for Key: The Metal Idol.
More to come soon.
KC - 2003-08-06 - 18:57:04A Note About How Things Work
Recently, the Goat has been getting heavy traffic...though some of you come looking for "goat love." When we say goat love, I don't think it means what you mean when you say goat love.So let me explain the Exploded Goat to you. In some ways we are like a blog, but we don't update a lot. Plus, we have content, which I think is anti-blog. The site is the brainchild of Kent Conrad and Joe Cormack. We seek love in the smart discussion of things that are cultish in pop culture (though I tend to review mainsteam-like movies that are overrated). Our form of seduction is the considered and not-too-wordy review.
So, if you're new, check out my vicious attack on George Lucas, and Joe's piece on Love, the psychedelic band from L.A.
Enjoy yourself.
KC - 2003-08-01 - 21:00:26'Sup?
Hey.Howzit going?
Good.
Things could be better, but as it stands, you're not in too bad a way. Know what I'm sayin'?
You should listen to Alice Cooper. Really. Some of the early stuff is good.
Anyway, two new episode guides for Key: The Metal Idol: 4 and 5.
A guide for Outlaw Star is coming.
That's it.
Bye.
KC - 2003-07-29 - 18:49:43All Apologies
This is a dead week. Some things will be added, but don't expect reviews. (If you want game reviews, tell me what you want.)An aside: In the last few years, a number of animated American shows of good quality have been on Adult Swim. Tonight Home Movies replaces Futurama - collectively the funniest shows on TV, never mind the genre or production style. Also, Samurai Jack is the best action show in the history of the medium. It's the only show I've seen where I don't mind the fact that the bad guys are robots. The appeal is in the execution, not the characters or plot. It is highly watchable.
Next week, on the anime side, three shows start on the Adult Swim: Big O, FLCL, and Blue Gender. Only Big O hasn't been available in the U.S. before, but it's great to get the Japanese madness for free.
KC - 2003-07-28 - 21:12:15Gary Coleman Was As Good As His Word
Ahem - time for random thoughts.
- Pirates Of The Caribbean is a fun movie that is exactly ten minutes too long. And they are at the end, which is a drag. But if you aren't moved by skeleton pirates who hit each other with swords, then you're not my kind of person.
- I have a review of Habit up, a Larry Fessenden movie that is surprisingly good.
- There's also a review of One Hour Photo. Mark Romanek can craft some brilliant images, but they alone do not a good movie make.
- Apparently, Knights Of The Old Republic is the greatest game in the history of man. Shame it won't be out on the PC until October. (Stupid X-Box.)
- New 16 Horsepower album out, Olden. It's a collection of unreleased and live tracks. When I get it, I'll review it.
Tetsuo! Kaneda! Vancouver! Remedy! Ibiza!
Belize?Ok, here's the first half of my Bowie DVD music video review. We do it not because you care, but because it hasn't been done before - at least not by anyone I know.
So enjoy.
KC - 2003-07-11 - 19:14:11Baby For Sale!
Nope, no baby for sale. Just a Utena review. Sorry.Recently, the anime I've watched has been boring. See last week's Rahxephon whine.
But Utena took me by surprise. Is it the most compulsively watchable show since Excel Saga? Nah, more so. Eva? Eh, screw comparisons. It's a good show.
But why do I jaw on when all you have to do is read the review?
KC - 2003-07-09 - 20:16:35The Itch
I sent this e-mail to KC on December 15, 1999. It was the birth of Exploded Goat.
Subj: Babylon Joe
I'm gonna start a rock mag. A REAL mag.
Every mag's got a niche, right? We'll call it "Pop Star," and the first cover will be a picture of Elvis over the word "Git." Game reviews, film caps –- whatever duckwalks, we'll do it.
Anti-intellectual –- none of this eager indie crap. No edgy planes just because they're edgy. Just us. Our goal? Not to be pedantic. Real tries at shaking down the irony idiots, and returning the rock 'n' roll heart to those who know that it beats for them.
Call me crazy. Why not? I know zip about starting a web-zine. But there is a silent majority who are sick and tired of the old "critics" sticking their putrid pot smells into corporate hash bullshit. (Call me an extremist?)
Everyone is trying to outdo Lester Bangs and his prosy flair. Let's screw Hemingway's head back on.
Say yea!
JC - 2003-07-08 - 03:05:08Inch By Inch, Step By Step
On the Goat, things are slowly returning to normal. For instance, we're reviewing a horror movie today. (None of this respectable genre and director stuff.) The good but overpraised Suspiria is our subject. Take notes.I read a number of Suspiria reviews, including Doug Winter's in the anthology, Cut: Horror Writers On Horror Film. The ecstasies that many people go through when watching the film weren't there for me, though it has a lot to offer. For the whole skinny, read the review.
The Jubei-chan episode guide is done. What a disappointing ending to a fair show. Oh well, can't be helped, I guess.
Expect more stuff when it arrives -- soon.
KC - 2003-07-07 - 23:12:28A Small Review
Anime Jump and Anime on DVD both like RahXephon. I found it boring - well-done, but same-y.But c'mon, Kent, you said that quality outweighs originality.
I know, but I said that the dependence on enigma as the sole driving force is bad, since it requires a feigned interest in things that we do not have enough information to be interested in. For me, RahXephon is too weird, too soon. Less should happen in the early episodes. (Most shows are paced wrong. They move in fits and starts. Shows that arc their mysteries and revelations are Escaflowne and Gasaraki, Key: The Metal Idol and Evangelion.)
I have to stress this. To me, a show's reliance on enigma points to a lack of interesting info. Any cleverwit can be enigmatic. It takes real artistic intelligence to make it stick.
There's a storytelling confusion here: not knowing the "what" of a story. Suspense does not rely on the withholding of information. Thus, suspense is superior to surprise -- not knowing the "why" can be intriguing. Like Cowboy Bebop, some anime needs to prove a larger influence than anime.
To Japan's creators of anime:
Read a freaking book once in a while.
That's all.Hey, have you read Joe's review of Pat Garrett & Billy The Kid? Do so -- it's good.
KC - 2003-07-02 - 09:24:53Ask Yourself, Ask Your Mom, Ask DNA
Today the Cowboy Bebop movie is released on DVD. I have seen it many times. Before the day is out, I will watch it again. Cowboy Bebop is the best action movie in years. It is better than The Matrix Reloaded, which kills the first film's sense of wonder1. It is better than Spiderman, which doesn't have a thought in its head. The Cowboy Bebop movie is that good. See it, my friends. You will be glad you did.Cal Worthington would watch it.
1The Matrix Reloaded is fun, but it is overdone, and the "intellectual" dialogue is ponderous and empty.
KC - 2003-06-24 - 15:35:58Something That Annoys Me
Consider this:"I disagree with what you say, but would fight to the death for your right to say it."
I want to go on record as saying that I would not. I mean, come on, if you came to me and said "Mafia is a flawless masterpiece!" or "George Lucas is a genius!," and a shadowy government agent put a gun to your head and demanded that you recant, I wouldn't lift a finger. That's your problem, not mine. I'd let them kill you (heh).
Likewise, if you said "I don't think Exploded Goat should review werewolf movies," and were hit by lightning, I'd leave you to your fate. In fact, I'd put up another werewolf movie review, just for spite. This one.
KC - 2003-06-24 - 09:28:38I Want To Live
Dead directors keep on calling me. So I review movies like Sam Peckinpah's Pat Garrett & Billy The Kid, and Blake Edwards' 10. Then I see Cal Worthington on TV. He should be dead, I say to myself. How long has he been selling cars? Fifty years? Wow. He is a model of endurance. I should post his picture, and eye it religiously.
After all, it is easy to memorialize the dead -- why not the living? But then I think about Paul McCartney and his solo career. He is living proof that the road to banality is paved with good intentions. Were they all just wasted years? Hmm... I don't think so. He might have written a bunch of silly love songs, but it's clear that he has a lust for music. He's good at it. And though many of his friends are dead, he has a family that loves him.
So, when I turn 23 on Friday, I will try to remember that the best art is the product of age (not youth) –- the sum impact of our lives on the world. That is the greatest legacy, and why it is important to stay alive.
Life is good.
JC - 2003-06-22 - 17:25:57Nonsense And Stuff
Here is the review of Darkwolf. I hope you appreciate my hard work. It should have been up yesterday, but things are slow right now and will be that way for some time. We are not a blog site, so we're not going to tell you our mood (manic) or what we're listening to ("In The Still Of The Night," Django Reinhardt), but I might as well explain something for those of you who give a damn. (Which will be my brother who knows already (he also happens to read the site), and Joe, who does not.)My dad is getting a hip replacement, and needs a good son to help him out. Thus, I am on good-son duty for a while, and will not have the time to write and sell freelance unsuccessfully. Tomorrow, for instance, they will be draining my blood, in case he needs it when he becomes bionic. So, no guarantees for the next few weeks. There will be one or two things, but a "regular" schedule it is not.
Thanks for reading, though. We appreciate it. Drop me a line at kent@explodedgoat.com to tell me that you don't care about my personal problems, and that worse things could happen at sea.
And please excuse the semi-blogging. I have a cold.
Mood: Self-pitying.
Listening to: "TVC15" (David Bowie).
You can shoot me now.
KC - 2003-06-17 - 22:40:54Been Quiet Recently
During the last three weeks, the Goat has been unusually quiet. So here is a treat - the bloggiest thing on the site.
DVD Commentary Tracks
Once you've heard a few of these, they start to lose interest - fast. The good ones may be filled with dead people who can no longer take offense at slander; some are filled with people who engage in friendly viciousness. The Evil Dead 2 track is fun, because Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell are old pals who laugh at each other and the silly little movie they made. However, the Raimi track on Spiderman is dull - all he does is talk about the greatness of so-and-so. This mars too many commentary tracks, where pustulent Hollywoodites stroke each other's egos. The narration can be just as bad, too: "Here, bad things are happening. Boy, that was bad." Clive Barker's commentary on Lord Of Illusions is a perfect example of this.
So here's a quick guide to commentary tracks on DVD:
- If it has Monty Python, it must be good. That includes Terry Gilliam mouthing off about his movies - he's an entertaining guy.
- If John DiMaggio (the voice of Bender) is on it. (He's on the Futurama disc.)
- If it has musicians who slam their own music videos. (If you can find it, get Lost In TV.)
- Animated movies (and live-action movies with CG) tend to have boring DVD tracks. Why? They're semi-technical. They don't explain things. I want to hear practical FX guys speak, not computer guys. (Tron is an exception - the commentary works.)
- An example of a GREAT commentary? This Is Spinal Tap.
Come Monday, we should have a new movie review. Thanks for your patience.
KC - 2003-06-15 - 21:09:54I Would Like To Apologize For The Following Announcement
The new review of Excel Saga is not a review. It is a lengthy recommendation, and it does not say anything. It is my fault - the show cannot be reviewed. Others have tried, at AnimeonDVD and AnimeJump, but Excel Saga can barely be described. It must be seen.But hold on. Don't assume that I'm saying this is the best anime of all time - that would be Cowboy Bebop. But Excel Saga is unique. It is more unique than anything. Read the review.
KC - 2003-06-11 - 22:45:56She Saw My TVC15, Baby's Gone
Reviewing can be boring. Obviously, no-one asked us to become reviewers, and if the amount of e-mail we get is any indication, no-one much cares that we are.But here's a dilemma: you watch a lot of crap, and most of it creates no reaction whatsoever. And when you're like Joe or myself, where the reviews have very little recitation of plot and are mostly concerned with analysis and observation, trying to do a thousand words on just about anything is like stabbing yourself in the eye with Pocky - painful, and a waste of something tasty.
So here are some reviews - short ones. Read 'em and weep.
Aguirre, Wrath of God
Docu-style, and amazing, with a potent sense of reality as the protagonist descends into madness. As slow as a documentary, too - not a lot happens, so the expectation is for the materials to carry themselves over and above any narrative interest. But the movie is still gorgeous and strange.
Angel Eyes
Crap. The most boring romance I've seen, and it pretends to be at least three different movies. Jim Caviezel is Anthony Perkins without the charm, Jennifer Lopez is the worst actress in the history of God, and the characters are empty and loathsome. Midway through, there is a decent performance of "Nature Boy." But who cares?
Drumline
A decent and formulaic maverick-makes-good movie about a drummer who learns to fly straight, but still keeps his mad skillz. A nice way to pass ninety minutes...but the son-of-a-bitch is two hours long. I got bored and left before it was over. If hip-hop and marching band music is your thing, more power to you.
In The Bedroom
Never overwrought, this is horrifying and depressing. But the character balance is not fair. Tom Wilkinson has an easy likeability that makes the ending very powerful, but I did not like the Sissy Spacek character, because other perspectives are given more time and consideration.
The Lady From Shanghai
A movie where nothing is real, but the fakery is compelling. Like most film noir, it has a sort of nightmare logic - desire consumes morality. The funhouse mirror sequence is mesmerizing.
The Passion Of Joan Of Arc
The greatest series of close-ups in the history of film. Maria Falconetti's face is all that matters. Carl Dreyer, the director, forced the actress to kneel on boards, so that physical pain looked like spiritual pain. The Criterion DVD adds the soundtrack written by Richard Einhorn, and it is wonderful. It also helps to maintain interest - we're all too stupid for silent movies these days.
Storm Riders
In this movie, a man who can control moisture is stuck in the desert, so he tears off his wounded arm to fire a stream of blood at his enemy. It is stupid, and you will like it. I particularly enjoyed the videogame dialogue, where fighters discuss their special moves with specific percentages to describe their efficacy. It is a Hong Kong violence fest aimed at teens, with two pretty boy leads. There are only two pretty girls (I like to look at pretty girls), but that's life. There is also a character who looks like a Chinese David Duchovny.
He plays the "Mud Buddha." In Journey To The West, he plays the "Pig Fairy." I wanna meet this guy.
Training Day
Until it gets stupid, this is good. But it has no center: is it about the degradations of police work and the hells of the street? Is it a James Ellroy cup of corruption? - a conspiracy story? Though it tries many things, the movie is not a full success. Denzel Washington is energetic, but he's wasted when the movie becomes a videogame shoot-out.
Vanilla Sky
Not as puzzling as it wants to be, Vanilla Sky suffers from a rather indifferent tone. It has elements of science fiction, but they are mostly half-assed. However, with the deadwood exception of Cameron Diaz, the performances work. I must admit: Tom Cruise has an engaging presence. And Kurt Russell shows the easy-going paternalism that should get him more roles.
KC - 2003-06-09 - 18:49:50
Thought I Forgot About You?
No, friends and neighbors, I was just taking Memorial Day off.This week, I have a review of a direct-to-video, The Barber. It isn't the worst DTV (that would be...well, what's on the Science Fiction Channel this week?), nor is it the best. Read the review, revel in my wisdom.
Though I read them, I don't like to talk about comic books - I'm ignorant of the scene. If they're gonna make a movie out of John Constantine, Alan Moore's greatest creation, more power to them, I say. I don't need it, but it would be cool. Then I see this: Constantine, starring Keanu Reeves. Now, I know you fanboys love him because of this whole Matrix thing (in MY day, we called it Tron), but gimme a break. My only consolation is that the movie won't happen, since it has been the subject of litigation and backbiting and whining.
Which reminds me: Hollywood! Find better ways of making movies!
KC - 2003-05-27 - 21:51:10Pretty Light Week
Yep, a pretty light week. Not a lot going on. Joe is engaging in real life, I am attempting to not waste mine, and thus you, the readers, feel short-shrifted.And I put up a review for Yankee Hotel Foxtrot and everything. Sometimes I wonder if you love me.
To make sure there are no hard feelings, I tried to find a funny picture, but...no dice.
Sorry.
KC - 2003-05-23 - 22:35:32Exploded Goat - Better Than The Rest?
I'm convinced we have the best game reviews in the world. The BEST! So good, we don't even need to review games. It's so evident, stooping to do it would be offensive.That's why we don't have a lot of game reviews. We're too good.
KC - 2003-05-23 - 15:42:07Twinkle, Twinkle Uncle Floyd
A small update, cos I'm busy. Not a decent excuse, but hey, I can't leave you guys without any indication of what's happening on the best goat-related website.Here's the new thing, an episode guide review for Jubei-chan. Yeah, a little chintzy, but at least I put it up.
I watch American Idol, and I'm so credulous that I don't even watch it cynically. But I have to complain: if these kids are selecting their own songs, they should have bigger record collections. Ruben Studdard on "I'll Be Your Mirror" or Clay Aiken on "Life On Mars" - that would be cool. Maybe the whole crowd getting together to do some "White Light/White Heat." That would be something.
On a semi-related note, David Bowie's version of "White Light/White Heat" blew me away when I saw him at the Universal Amphitheater. It was the first time I'd heard it (I was a late Velvets bloomer), and wow. The lighting was great, too - very stark. Listening to some recent bootlegs of his live stuff, the lack of Reeves Gabrels really makes the music seem older - not 'stately,' but not as weird. Earl Slick is one hell of a guitarist, but never too flashy.
By the way, if you haven't seen DB live, you should.
Speaking of music, "Slip Away," from Heathen, is one of his best songs. It has a level of passion not often associated with the Thin White Duke. And note the nicknames I use to connote that we have a relationship. Sickening.
Look at this lady to the left. Yoko Kanno, one of the finest modern composers, and an honest-to-God genius. She's stuck doing soundtracks for anime that doesn't deserve her (Cowboy Bebop excluded. They're both equally fine). Somebody in Hollywood oughta give her a ring.
KC - 2003-05-21 - 22:21:34SimCrap
Six months ago, I bought SimGolf, and I didn't play it until last night. It is a pattern for me with every single Sim game - the first time I play it, it seems terrific. There are many things to plan. 'Oh, look at my money a-raising. Look at all those golf courses. Can't wait to keep advancing.'In one day, I played for five hours, glad as a monkey. Today I load up SimGolf, play it for ten minutes, and I start to feel the vomit rise.
It happened to me with The Sims. I played it for one day, then on the next day, it felt like a pneumatic hammer was bashing my brains. So, until they're cheap, don't buy Sim games. Please.
KC - 2003-05-20 - 16:47:50Two Things
I haven't been friendly of late. That is, I haven't had any witticisms to share or hamfisted attempts at humor to put on the front page. There are some reasons for this. One: If you're reading this, you're probably me, proofing it so that Joe doesn't have to. If you're not me, you're probably Joe, proofing it and wondering how the hell KC graduated from college. Two: For several weeks, I will be busy pretending to move into a career. I'm not, of course - most of my life is a sham, but I like to pretend anyway. So if you find our front page boring, well, here's your nickle back - and a kiss on the cheek. Good night.My long-in-the-works Ring/Ringu feature is now up. It has pictures. By the way, Naomi Watts is prettier than Nanako Matsushima. I don't mention it in the article, but it's true. Nanako has more of a TV anchorwoman look - fit for the role and pleasant to look at, but Naomi really is beautiful. Well, I think the article is more cogent than this...(at least I hope so). Read it.
Please.
Also, I want to note that Joe does the copy editing on the Goat. Mainly because he has a good eye for it (and is not lazy). Lately, he's been occupied with something called real life, so if you notice our standards drop, that's because a) Joe is doing important things, and b) Kent (me) is not.
So stuff is square.
This is from Maaya Sakamoto's webpage. Except for the English part, I don't know what it says. But it makes one thing clear: if you want to say something important, write it in English. She's thumbing her nose at her own language, and she's saying, "Screw you, Nihongo, you can't say what I need you to say." In fact, screw every language BUT English. And that goes double for you, Maaya.
E3 - Why I'm Fifteen Miles Away, And Not There
Because I'm not in the press, and nobody loves me. Because I get maybe twenty hits a day, and if I could get video game exclusives, nobody would read them. So, I'm a little bummed, and this is why I'm plumbing the depths of my record collection for reviews of The Serpent's Egg and Moss Side Story.In reference to Dead Can Dance, I remember when, a couple of years ago, I could hear some boring, earnest track from an artist and say "That sounds like a 4AD track" and everybody would laugh, because it was true. Nowadays, I can't do that. I buy maybe four albums a year, and in the last month, I bought maybe twenty-five books and no albums. What does this mean? I'm smarter than you.
(And I wonder why I don't get readers?)
E3 - Stuff That Looks Good To Me
What really sucks about this particular E3 is that there's a lot of really good-looking stuff coming out. Technology has progressed to the point where the graphics/animation baseline is so high, it's hard to bitch about pictures and videos. Everything looks good, which means everything is better, since pretty games are by definition better than ugly ones.
Worlds Of Warcraft could get me into the sort of money suck-pump that is MMORPGs, and I don't even like Blizzard games all that much. But it looks cool.
Call Of Duty
Medal Of Honor designers, the European theater, playing as Americans, Brits, and Ruskies. Killing Nazis. It's a shame there aren't more Nazis to kill nowadays. Maybe I should kill my neighbors. One of them is bald, and skinheads are Nazis. I'm gonna go kill me a Nazi.
Vampire The Masquerade: Bloodlines
In high school, a lot of my friends played the Vampire role-playing game. Generally, they set it on our high school campus in order to murder the people they didn't like in school.
I played with them once. I didn't do too well.
Anyway, here's a video of the upcoming game from Troika, makers of the failed Arcanum. The graphics are pretty good - if we can't all have female empowerment affirming flat-chested girls in our games, I'm glad we have the technology that can make gigantic breasts bounce right. Watch the video, you'll understand.
Evil Genius
This looks like Dungeon Keeper, except it's all about killing people, and nothing makes me happier than murder. If it doesn't suck (and it might well), it should be fun.
KC - 2003-05-16 - 14:46:23I'm The Man Who Loves You
There is a very important point made in my movie review for Monster's Ball. We are the only website that loves you. That's why we are so honest, and why I don't review new games - I honestly don't care about them. See? Honesty.More honesty... Umm...I want to offend you. So here goes:
Last week marked the anniversary of the Kent State "massacre." Four people were killed. Right now, Joe is having me review the ancient game Blood for one of our 'Joe vs. KC' things. In, like, the first two minutes, I kill eight guys, not counting the zombies. So me playing Blood is like twice as big a deal as Kent State.
Offended? Well, honestly...
KC - 2003-05-12 - 16:15:27Dance, Monkey, Dance
That's what we do - we dance for you. You don't even pay us a freakin' nickel, and we dance. That's what we do.Another thing we try to do is be regular in our content provision, so you and your homies can, y'know, do whatever it is you do between hookah inhalations and beer-bong hits. Ugh -- you sicken me. Not as much as a grown man who spends his time writing about cartoons and video games, but still: pretty sick.
But, we have content. Were he so inclined, some street tough of vaguely ethnic origin might call it ill. An anime review of the pleasant and perverse Cardcaptor Sakura, and of the pretend game-puppet show, The Dark Eye. I'm pretty positive about them, which means that the reviews are deadly dull. Feel free to skip them.
By the way, next week is the inauguration of our new schedule, so that content is more regular, (like the nitroglycerin pills that keep our collective hearts from exploding...goat-wise). Here's the deal: On Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays, there will be new stuff. Movies on Mondays, Anime on Wednesdays. Fridays, we get giggy with music and new features. Known internationally as "lazy, stupid, no-good son-of-a-bitch bastard man" day, (in honor of the Sabbath), Saturdays are for games. Like I did today with The Dark Eye. So I guess the schedule starts now.
So I'll dance for you. Just keep your paws off my sister.
KC - 2003-05-10 - 16:43:54Obscure Game Gets Sequel, Makes Nerd Happy
Hello. How are you?That's not good. And you say it's been weeping?
Should probably get a doctor to look at it. As long as it didn't lay eggs in you - that would be bad.
Anyway, I'm fine. Been working hard trying to provide you with, say, a Wind Waker review, several weeks after you bought the game. At Exploded Goat, we are far more concerned with writing useless things than we are with influencing your purchases.
There are a few new entries in the Key: The Metal Idol episode guide, and a new one in the Jubei-chan guide. On this site, I work on these the most, and certainly they are the least read by anyone. Makes me wonder why I don't just lay down and die.
Oh, yeah, the new game sequel - Majesty. It looks good. Eric Wolpaw of Old Man Murray wrote a good review so I don't have to. So there you go.
KC - 2003-05-05 - 13:15:25The World Needs To Play More Video Games
I'm facing a bit of a dilemma. It isn't Sophie's Choice (I'd send both kids to the Nazis and write books about my experience), but it is the sort of problem that arises when a culture makes individuals too well off too soon. My major issue is that I no longer feel a twinge of annoyance at the existence of the Playstation 2. I'm borrowing my brother's, and every game I've played has been a delightful experience. Granted, I've only been engaging the cream of the crop, but I'm still having a good time. Sly Cooper and Ico are my main diversions, and they are making me wonder if my allegiance to Zelda is a sham concocted by my fevered brain to keep me from having a lot of fun. Wind Waker is an amazing experience. (It will be reviewed tomorrow, so that all 2% of you who haven't bought it,
and may, will get to hear my discreditable warblings.) But there's an almost elegiac beauty to Ico that makes me wish it were the more popular title (and I may review it, too). It is to sigh, children.For the first time in a long time, I'm posting a music feature. Y'know, one of those long articles that sates some obscure need. So if you get a Zombies compilation and want to know what other people think, well, here you go. Hope you like it.
I've also started writing episode guides for Key: The Metal Idol. Here's the first one.
KC - 2003-05-02 - 21:54:17Have Any Of You Missed Out On Homestarrunner?
If so, go here. It makes me happy to be happy. KC - 2003-05-02 - 21:53:36May. Mei. Satsuki.
Neoranga.That's it.
I've been looking forward to the DVD treasures put out by Disney...and now it seems that they've been sold out to pimply mouth-breathers who think that selling them on Ebay will make enough money to buy a filipino woman. I wanna get me some black & white Mickey cartoons, you jerks.
Anyway, this post shall knock Joe's superlative Lennon piece off the front page, but that doesn't mean it's gone. Here is that message all by its lonesome self. And here is the archive of all our front page rants. If you haven't been here for a while, that means you missed my one and only web-comic and the least tasteful thing ever put on the site, period. Gee, I wish I had more time to dredge up funny pictures.
KC - 2003-05-01 - 09:17:49You Are Here
Am I?RPGs for the computer want to keep me from playing them. Why? Because it is my experience that they wish to cut out, y'know, for a good software crash, right when I'm saving. It happened last week when I reinstalled Dungeon Siege for a run-thru, and now that I'm on Wiz 8 (despite its numerous deficiencies), my computer has decided to pull the same trick. The horrors of Wiz 8 are manyfold: each fight is a life-and-death struggle against terrible odds, and the random level of combat means that tactics play less of a role than do saving and reloading.
So I think Wiz 8 sucks. And everytime I play it, it gets worse. I can't write a review, since pride in my work demands that I play the game at least halfway through, or until the play mechanics and story have revealed themselves to the point where nothing but an incredible drop-off in quality would damage them. So, while I can say that I don't like Wiz 8 and would not recommend it to anyone, I can't write a cogent defense of my dislike in review format. I hate it, but there's not a whole lot I can do about it.
By the way, the above-stated reason is why the game section is largely neglected. It takes a lot of playing to put down a review, and most games I do not like can't move me to. I'll have more soon, mehopes, but I cannot guarantee anything. Anyway, you folks come here mainly for Joe.
New review up, for the movie Wendigo. Lately I have been turning in negative reviews. The problem is clear: you entertainment providers (out there) aren't stepping up to the plate. Get to work.
KC - 2003-04-24 - 19:58:50I Thought I Hated George Lucas Before...
But look at this. Just look at it. This goddamn character's name is Elan Sleazabaggano. If that's not the stupidest thing you've ever heard, then you are stupider than George Lucas. And do you really want to be stupider than the man who actually likes this? Ugh.I've been a little quiet here on the front page, mainly because I've had little to say. Let's all be honest, I'm not that interesting. Maybe a little clever once in a while, but nothing to really listen to regularly. Occasionally I have something to offer, like a mini-review of Postal 2:
Postal 2 is boring. Don't play it.
See? Or how about an anime review: Noir, which I wanted to like, except that it isn't any good. Or a couple of Jubei-chan episode guides, specifically episodes 8 and 9? How's that for content? And who knows, maybe there'll be more later today. And you folks don't even write to see if we're ok. Sniff...
KC - 2003-04-23 - 10:07:07Winston
Last night I dreamt about John Lennon. I was in a crowded theater, waiting for The Beatles to reunite onstage after more than thirty years. John was alive, and the group was finally going to play. I knew I was dreaming. But there they were, necktied and respectably older. They did all the old stuff: solo tunes, group tunes -- the whole shebang. The set was lively, loose and fun. John, in particular, looked great -- optimal John, you could say. And I found it quite characteristic of him to slow the show down in the middle and engage the audience in a banter, which the band funneled into pop bits created on the spot. I loved it. Looking about, I saw kids clapping, young and old, smiling and enjoying themselves. I was a kid, too, and how appropriate, I thought: John always wrote for the inner child. A crazy dream? Yeah, but I loved every second of it...I don't know if John Lennon was a genius; I don't know if he was a nice guy. But I do know that he was a great singer, and that his music means a lot to a lot of people, myself included.
I can't write about The Beatles. To do so would be silly and redundant -- we all know how great they were. Sgt. Pepper is a marvelous album, and why? It encapsulates everything great about art and music and bullshit. At the same time that it broke free of the conventions of music, it effectively killed rock 'n' roll. That's a big claim for anyone to make, but there you go.
Rock 'n' roll is never just what it is (things rarely are). At its best, it is among the finest, most expressive and direct means of communication I know. And now that it has been historicized to death, we can safely say that rock 'n' roll is first and foremost about pain (with pleasure not too far behind).
This is not to say that rock 'n' roll (never just "rock") cannot work simply as entertainment. Much of its longevity is down to the wily shenanigans of businessmen and art school types (and kids on the street and in the 'burbs, bored out of their minds). But if we are to take rock 'n' roll seriously, and for more than at face value, we mustn't lose sight of its base in the blues, either.
Obviously, we are talking about more than just race here. We are talking about hurt. John was a talent who, like Hitler before him, came out of a bad family situation. Is that too simplistic a thing to say? Probably. But it's hard to deny or put aside all the creativity that came from that pain, and it's hard not to trace such an outgrowth to the way it developed.1
Whether as something possessed or observed, genius is an elusive property. After all, what do we really know about this bandied word? Well, we know that genius is not a vacuum. That it takes genius to recognize genius, let alone show it. Life, then, is about other people: to get things done, we cannot simply (re-)produce by our own selves -- we have to help each other out with our respective loads. "The daisy chain makes it plain that we're all just yin and yang": There would be no Pet Sounds without Phil Spector, no Citizen Kane without the Germans, and the mad repetitions of "Sister Ray" would not exist were it not for Lou Reed's shame about who he was and what his parents wanted him to be -- and the cost of living is the price of poetry (and all subsequent liberation), etc. In a sense, we're all capable of genius. We just have to eat slop and ask for more when preaching about love and law. We have to sacrifice, and we have to do it together. That's not cynical, and that's not philosophy. That's life.
So John was this and John was that. To pick one over the other is meaningless and fair. Like John, I prefer the 'truth,' and the implication that truth can be bunk and never entirely honest. As long as we' re upfront about it, and true to ourselves, there's nothing wrong with being a dreamer. Because it's rock 'n' roll, and rock 'n' roll is real, the core message of Lennon's music2 (if there is one) is that we owe it to ourselves to live life fully, to fill in as much of the canvas as possible, and to just sort of play it.
There comes a point when a magazine like Rolling Stone (or NME, or Spin) will not do. When the mass effort to categorize and rate damns our subjectivity. Exploded Goat never will (nor did it intend to) canonize or somehow measure the merits of people's achievements according to some prescribed standard of excellence.3 KC and I are simply trying to figure out what we like and why, and hopefully who we are. That's all. It could be important, or not -- I don't think it matters. If you like us, great. If you don't, that's great too. We appreciate whatever audience we can get.
In the end, John was only John, I am only Joe, and you are only you. We are the eggmen, and we can only be ourselves.
1Sometimes I wonder if one's celebrity (or dramatic world-changing) is not the result of that person's bruised ego. John's anger was apparently big enough that the whole world heard it, and still does. All that pain comes busting out, so much that the amplified artist is no longer alone now that the lengths of his isolation have spread to win the hearts of many. That, I think, is a cool way of finding out just how loved each one of us really is.
Though it may be hard to see, all of us have someone who loves us, right?
Anyway, all we can do is be.
2Or, for that matter, Kiss -- the band.
3Most 'critics' fuss when it comes to taste, and I guess that's OK. But that's not the Goat. I'll bet that most of them know nothing about pain, and, consequently, very little about rock 'n' roll. Besides, the best music (or cinema) is always the best criticism of that form.
* * *
In content news, I have three things on the way: two movie reviews and a list-like music feature. So hang on!
JC - 2003-04-20 - 01:22:48Things You Need To Know
Mainly about video games.Gamecube (a.k.a. the system with 2 good games a year) will be getting another console RPG soon, Tales Of Symphonia, which will bring the system's RPG game count to two.
No word yet on whether the game will be based entirely on trying to see your PC's panties, (like Xenogears), but look at that shot. Nobody looks older than 8. What Japanese developer could resist?
In even stupider news, I reviewed The Zombies' Odessey & Oracle. And were I asked, I'd review it a second time, or a third. But that's it.
KC - 2003-04-14 - 10:09:55We've Got Spirit, Yes We Do!
You can complete the above sentence without my assistance, so I would just as soon you do so without me.I've taken up the habit of interchanging (one might say metathesizing, if one wished to use the wrong word) "do" and "so" for no decent reason. It is what one does when one spends too much time on one's own. One also develops a sort of intermittent formality that can drop from one's style faster than one can say "crapweasel."
CONTENT!
I've been upgrading the anime episode guide for Jubei-Chan, though I wonder why. My reviews have become more prescriptive of late, and I do not believe that Akitaroh Daichi is really listening to me. So, at best, that means the folks reading them can use them for helping to evaluate their own reactions. Or so they can notice stuff they don't like in a show they thought was OK, thus ruining the experience for everybody. Well, screw you.
Oh, the URLs are here for ep. 6 and here for the subsequent one, cleverly numbered 7.
Also, I've got a new game review for an ancient game you're lucky to find for sale anywhere. It's called Sacrifice. It's okay. Read the review.
KC - 2003-04-10 - 19:55:31Another Mini-complaint/Rant/Whine About Anime
With three big Miyazaki movies coming out next week, I thought it would be the perfect time (actually, next week would be the perfect time, but I'll probably forget what I wanted to say) to go into more detail about why you do not see more anime content here on the Goat.
I. Anime Is Boring
Now, that's an unfair blanket statement, but there is some truth to it. A few years into my anime revival, I am having a hard time finding interest in any commercial artform/genre/whatever that can sustain itself on Cybernetic Maid/Harem shows. Look at this scintillating and wholly convincing graph full of information:
Seriously, folks, this is one homogenized and overtreated archetype/cliche/lazy writer's trope so that he can get some saki earlier in the day.
II. I Am Broke
Just as pressing to the anime community is the fact that, well, I can't afford it anymore. As prices go down, so has my ability to procure funds and make myself societally useful. So, I only purchased 'enemy' when it wasn't nearly as good a deal as it is now. Sigh.
III. I Never Watch It
I have nearly 100 anime DVDs, and, in general, I watch it less than once a month. Usually, I have to force myself to watch - I simply do not have the desire. Mainly, it's because of the next point (and perhaps the only legitimate one I have).
IV. The Established Paradigms Of Anime Are Never Challenged
For me, the primary interest of anime is seeing stories dealt with in a serious manner in an artform (animation) that is often the home of empty-mindedness. So, when anime is used for serious purpose (not to mean stentorious self-seriousness, but rather with the ends to utilize the medium because of its potential), it can be terrific. I point to Lain, Cowboy Bebop, and Escaflowne. These are top-tier shows. The middle-tier, mere workman-like stuff (Trigun, Bubblegum Crisis, and Outlaw Star) have at least decent storytelling techniques.
However, these intelligent uses of the media are few and far between, and with more scrutiny the average anime seems inadequate. In Japanese media, there are tendencies that are seriously deleterious to decent product, and the primary one is lazy writing. Ringu is one of the creepiest movies of recent years, and that is almost entirely despite an empty script, which opens up numerous plot lines that don't make any sense, uses psychic ability as a crutch for bad plotting, and is mainly a mess. That it is an intriguing mess is because of (and this is somewhat typical for Japanese media) a great visual sense. Ringu is scary because it looks scary. Most anime looks better than American animation not because of the number of frames used or the smoothness of action (both of these are inferior to typical American animation), but because of the beautiful sense of design. Uniformity of culture has led to a great refinement of technique. But, just as easily, this refinement often leads to laziness.
Do you love anime? Well, take this test: what was the last show you saw that had a quotable joke? What was the last plot twist that was genuinely surprising? Why is there so much homogenization of content? Are you really intrigued by another taciturn hero who can't connect emotionally, another emotionless blue-haired girl, another robot-warrior chick whose entire life revolves around loving some unlikable nerd1? Nowadays, the giant robots are alive, but the characters are not. And, for the sake of Mike (Toole?), how many panty shots must we endure before we feel it move from 'novel and cute' to 'sick and boring'?
1Some argue that the central joke in Tenchi Muyo is that Tenchi, surrounded by hot babes who would like to jump his spongy bones, is perhaps the blandest, emptiest character in the series. I don't buy it, for a few reasons: 1) all the characters in t
he show are pretty white-bread; and 2) this would make sense if we had a contrasting character, another male with real personality, so that we can see for ourselves that Tenchi is the wettest of blankets. All else is guesswork2.
2Does the mere fact that I'm writing seriously about this at all turn the site into a postmodern sort of exercise of empty self-regard? Does anybody care, and if you do, does it matter that you do? Are these thoughts of interest to anyone, or are we just a niche? How many people am I really talking to? Let yourselves be known. Mail it to me, friends.
Ruskies And WWII
Take a look at this trailer. It's for an upcoming tactical combat game, Silent Storm. It looks like the sort of game a guy like me dreams about: great 3D graphics (see, they're possible!) with a deep sort of game style. And it is TURN-BASED! That means no click-festing, and none of the micromanagement stupidity that plagues RTS games. I can't find screenshots to give you, so enjoy this photo instead:
I stole it from Rate My Kitten, where you can rate people's kittens. It's one of the top kittens.
I also put up a new movie review: Seance On A Wet Afternoon. Not anything like it sounds, but read the review - it's one of my thinking-type pieces, full of BS philosophy on art and stuff.
KC - 2003-04-02 - 12:11:42New Goat, Same As The Old Goat?
Hello! Welcome! New GOATS!!!That's right, we have a new goat in town, a goat that isn't going to take any crap from you crumb bums!
The new site is more colorful, more streamlined, and has a few more kittens hidden within. In general, it's a good thing (spoken in a Martha Stewart-type voice). So take a look around, and if you happen to stumble upon anything horribly WRONG, drop me an e-mail so I can fix it. Only a few things aren't up yet, so within the next few days everything should be fine, and we should have some new reviews too, just to make our fresh goat a legitimate one.
KC - 2003-04-01 -